Date: Thursday, July 24, 2008
Title: Have A Little Faith.
Rating: PG-16 (or whatever, check the warnings)
Pairings: Jared Padalecki/Chad Michael Murray
Warnings: RPS, AU, slash, silliness, fluff, attempts at humor, some swearing. Also, author claims her right to hurt all Chad haters on sight.
Summary: Chad is just an awful asshole, obviously not made for serious relationships. And since Jared knows him best, he should also know that. And he does. No, really.
Disclaimer: I can't claim any sort of ownership on any of the characters appearing in this story. Also it's not my business what they're doing in theirs private lives, so even if it would be a true relationship – I wouldn't know about it.
Beta: None! (If someone would be willing to help, I'd be really glad!)
A/N: Wrote for moosesal's amazing Non-J2 CW Real Person Ficathon. The prompt for that fic (even if it turned differently that I saw it at first) is quoted at the beginning of the story.
When your secret heart
Cannot speak so easily
Come here darlin
From a whisper start
To have a little faith in me
- John Hiatt, "Have a Little Faith in Me"
Jared always suspected that 'not falling for Chad' plan would be much easier if it'd be put into action before Jared was already lost. Too bad that he was oblivious enough to let the fact that he was falling in love somehow slip from his consciousness.
You see, despite the fact that Jared is higher than most and has muscles of a regular hockey player, he's a sweet and adorable dork. Everybody who had spent like ten minutes in his company understood this, but then it was already too late, even if they hated that kind of guys. They were under the famous Padalecki charm.
Still, Jared was a dork-y outgrown puppy (as Chad suggested). And sometimes that awfully cuddly part of him (the same one that once upon a time was stealing Megan's - his younger sister - romance novels) wanted to have a sweet, cute come-out story.
He was twelve, when he met Chad. He was sitting peacefully in the literature class, in one of the last rows – even if back then he wasn't that tall - when a kid with too long, blonde hair falling into his blue eyes, fallen unto the seat next to him.
"I figured I can't mid-term and mid-school mix with the really cool people, but you seem pretty cool and I sure am pretty cool, so together we should be quite awesome, right?" he said, gesturing wildly, to show his point.
"Yeah... I suppose... Although, I'm afraid most of the cool-types already know we're not that cool and even adding our coolness won't help."
"Huh." Chad distractively put his hair out of his eyes with one hand, before turning back to Jared with almost blinding smile. "Have no fear, dude. We'll figure some plan."
And then, seeing those sweet blue eyes and the sparkling smile... Jared fell in love.
Yeah, he probably did. But unfortunately it wasn't at all how the whole mess with coming-out started. Chad didn't turn him gay, Sandy did.
They barely started high school and Chad was sort of hoping they'll be finally able to get into the 'cool' group then. Jared somehow doubted that genius plan. Not only because the past thousand and one of Chad's plans didn't work out, but mostly, because they're attended the high school near theirs houses, so there wasn't much of a change in school's society.
Then Jared met Sandy: small, pretty brunette that seemed then like a dream come true. A wet one at that.
Literally, since Jared met her, when he tripped over and spilled a big cup of some fuzzy drink at her blouse. After that she announced that she has slept for way too short time to be able to yell at him properly, so he just have to buy her coffee now. As in now!
She was the sweetest thing ever, even if on occasion she could scare the crap out of senior guys, and Jared was delighted with the possibility of taking her out for the coffee. After half an hour he discovered the joy of the conversation with someone who actually listened to him (and not just pretend, like Chad often did). After an hour Jared was ready to run to the small vent-machine behind the door that offered plastic rings for 50 cents, and propose. After two hours Sandy admitted that she wants to be friends forever and ever, because she always believed that such a great gay best friends happens only in movies.
Which left Jared flabbergasted.
"So... You're like... into guys?"
"She says so," confessed Jared and took a long swig from the beer bottle he was holding.
He was pretty sure his older brother is going to kill him for stealing his beer, but Jared was desperate. He stole Chad from his own home and a six-pack from the fridge and came up to his room for some serious talk.
"And you like... never noticed before?" asked Chad again, obviously trying to grasp all that Jared was telling him.
"Sandy says I'm in denial."
"She's a weird cookie in this jar, you know? I mean... why should you believe in such a thing? She doesn't know you! What the hell she can know about you! I know you! I'd know if you were having some cock-sucking thoughts in that fuzzy brain of yours."
As ridiculous as it sounded, it made some sense, actually. Or so Jared thought at least, feeling slightly reassured. Because it was true that Chad knew him better than anyone else, so if Jared was gay - Chad would knew, right? The problem was Chad could be awfully unobservant on occasion. To put it mildly.
Not to mention that maybe denial was contagious.
"I still think I should test this theory," decided finally Jared, gaining his courage.
"Ya should. Can I go now? I don't wanna see any of the testing going around this theory."
"Then better close your eyes."
"Wha-?" exclaimed Chad and since he recently drastically shortened his hair lately, his bangs couldn't hide the ridiculous widening of his eyes. "Dude, you're not thinking what I think you're thinking, cause if you're thinking than you're fucking crazy."
Jared huffed with irritation.
"Come on, Chad! I'm gonna kiss you once and we'll have this whole mess over, okay? I mean, who else I should try this on?"
"I don't know! I don't care! Kiss some random pedestrian or random pederast for all I care! Fuck, kiss this Sandy girl! If it won't work out at all than you're gay!" He stopped for a moment as if thinking about it. "Or you have some surviving instincts..."
Jared grabbed his friend's wrist, stopping him from moving further away on the floor or even worse - getting up and walking out on Jared. He made his best 'kicked puppy' face and noticed Chad averting his gaze and shaking his head.
"Dude, help me out, 'k? Just once, it'll gross both of us out and we'll be free of crazy women that want to turn us gay forever, ok?"
Chad sighed dramatically, playing the role of a martyr to the end. Still he slid closer to where Jared was sitting with his back prompted on the bed.
"One time. For educational purpose. And if I ever am gonna find myself a sexy girl you're like totally forbidden to even mention this whole episode, got it?"
"I'll be quiet as a grave!" promised Jared with a big grin. "Even if you'll find yourself a sexy boyfriend instead."
"Fuck you," mumbled Chad, sliding even closer, so they were just inches apart, they're knees bumping. "I'm not the one going through a crisis here."
Jared snorted and awkwardly put his big palms on Chad's shoulders, the other boy leaning slightly, closing up some distance. Barely few more inches to go, but the awkwardness fell on them completely frizzing them in place.
"Uh..." stated intelligently Jared, his breath washing over Chad's cheek.
"Oh, fuck it," mumbled back the other boy, sliding both of his hands onto Jared's neck and up, tangling them in his hair.
He quickly brought Jared's head closer and moved the small distance left between theirs mouth, starting the testing kiss.
At first Jared felt nothing special, just a soft touch of lips upon his. Pleasant, yet altogether not worth the fireworks. Then, of course, Chad obviously decided that if that's going to be theirs only gay kiss in life, they should make it really count.
He tugged Jared's head closer, slightly changing the angle to make it easier, and slowly slid his tongue into the other's mouth. Jared sighed quietly now also tugging Chad closer, which was a bit hard in their unfortunate positions. Still, he wanted to be as close as he could get, because that felt waaaaay better that he thought. The sweet pressure, the playful swings of tongue against tongue, the light taste of pepper-mint chewing gum...
They withdrew to catch a breath. Chad's hands were still tangled in Jared's hair and Jared's palms were squeezing Chad's arms almost painfully.
"You gay?" asked Chad quite breathless.
"Yeah..." breathed Jared, shock and defeat obvious in his eyes. Chad just nodded quickly.
And he kissed him again.
They didn't end up as a couple after this afternoon and quite serious making out session. Well, not fully. Not exactly. Well, Chad forbid the use of words like 'couple', 'boyfriends' or 'relationship' anywhere near them, so Jared didn't.
As blonde explained, they were just like those hot chicks in porn industry: they were fooling around until the right guy came along. Or right chick in this case. And as disturbing as this vision was, Jared just went along with it, on the start forbidding even thoughts about the threesomes.
That was also around this time, when Sandy made Jared - her new best gay-friend - promise to never fall in love with Chad. Because Chad was an asshole when Jared met him and he was just getting worse since. Sandy was obviously right, so Jared with a light heart of someone, who believes in sure goal, promised exactly what she wanted to hear.
Took him awhile to notice how stupid he was.
Chad found his 'right chick', while fucking his way through the college. Jared admitted that Sophia was nice and intelligent girl with great looks and the only thing that worried him was that she was obviously stupid enough to hang out with Chad. Later Jared decided Sophia was also a manipulative bitch, but he figured out it was less about her and more about the fact that Chad fall for her. And proposed.
And Jared did not approve.
Still, he dragged his sorry, brooding ass from Sandy's couch and organized Chad's bachelor's party, as the best man should. And just in spite Chad's soon-to-be-wife and his declarations that he's now a decent, honest man, Jared blew him in the men's room of the club they were having party at.
Maybe it wasn't the nicest thing to do, but Jared figured since Sophia didn't catch them it didn't hurt her. And it sure as hell helped Jared survive the whole wedding mess. He even managed to smile a few times, mostly to the guitarist of the band on the reception.
Obviously Jared's theory was right: Sophia was much more hurt when she caught up Chad in the act of betraying her. With Kenzie, her ex-roommate from college and bridesmaid.
"You're actually going to marry this Kenzie chick?" asked Jared, already slightly drunk, looking over his beer at Chad.
"Yeah. I think... I think maybe she's the right one," he sounded honest enough, but Jared snorted unbelievingly anyway.
Chad smiled slightly.
"Yeah, well. You're again my best man, okay? Just... you know... be nice on my bachelor's party..."
"You kid me? I'm always nice!"
This time the case was looking more serious. Chad was obviously really trying to be decent. He talked at length about how he and Kenzie were perfect matches for each other. He didn't collapse drunk at the end of his bachelor's party and he didn't let Jared's blew him either. He was a perfect soon-to-be husband.
Through the whole wedding and reception, Chad practically didn't let his eyes drop from Kenzie. He was obviously – as every old aunt at the wedding cared to tell Jared - head over heels in love with his newest wife.
Jared hadn't passed out drunk either. Not at the bachelor's party and not at the reception. But still he was drunk enough to not remember what he fucked to make himself feel slightly less pathetic.
"Coming, coming," mumbled Jared, before yawning loudly.
He started working as a bartender lately and night's shifts weren't really matching well with being woken up at eight o'clock by mad banging on the door. He shook his head to clear it and opened the door slightly shocked at who stood behind it.
Chad was in jeans and white button-up shirt, covered with black suit jacket. And even if ruffled and slightly wrinkled as if after long trip, it still looked quite formal for Chad. And unbelievingly hot. While his guest run his hand nervously through his short hair, Jared took in the suitcases standing next to him.
"What's wrong?" he asked worried and Chad shrugged.
"Can I come in?" he asked, trying to sound as casual as possible.
"Sure man," answered the sleepy man quickly and already moved slightly to let his guest into the room.
"Can I stay?"
Jared looked at him shocked, but Chad with full force tried to feign that it was absolutely innocent and normal question. And then Jared noticed slightly strained pose of the other man and understood that he apparently wasn't sure what the answer would be.
Since Jared was always a romantic in heart, he wanted to answer with something meaningful, sweet and worth remembering. Unfortunately after sleeping for barely two hours and not eating for six, the only thing his brain could come up with was:
But it obviously worked as charm, since it made Chad grin at him full force.
"Well..." started Sandy carefully after hearing Jared chat excitedly about the news. "I suppose three times is a charm..."
Her only answer was only a silent anger and she immediately felt guilty that she wasn't capable of playing it better. Even if she felt the ice-block in her stomach caused by all the worries that came with Jared's happy announcement.
"Sandy..." Started Jared finally, obviously angered. "Could you please not treat me as Chad's third wife, thank you very much!"
"Well, I'm sorry Jared! But you know that guy waaay longer than any of them did, and you're still stupid enough to hook up with him! Come on, I love you and I want the best for you and all, but do you honestly believe this relationship can last?"
He couldn't answer that question and it was the best sign that Sandy's words actually got to him.
It was half a year into the marriage, when Sophia caught Chad cheating. It was two months spend in Kenzie's hometown before the things got roughly broken up.
It was three weeks since Chad moved in, when Jared searched through his pockets for some clues. And came with nothing.
"As I hate to say it: maybe he hasn't done anything. Yet," added Sandy, obviously hating the idea of protecting Chad.
Jared looked at her over his coffee-cup and she just shrugged as if to say that weirder things been known to happen. Somewhere, probably…
"He's disappearing more and more often," he finally said quietly.
"Well, maybe he really is looking for a job..." mused Sandy.
"Why are you so set on protecting him now?" asked Jared, slightly irritated with his friend's changing moods.
"'Cause your miserable, baby," she admitted and patted him on the head.
He snorted, his mood slightly brightened by the obvious care in this statement. Even if he didn't exactly like the idea that he's obviously moping enough for his friend to start thinking up some unbelievable stories to show Chad in a better light. He saw Chad in a better light than others all the time. Actually, he was just trying to stop, so the reality won't hurt too much, when he'll have to finally meet it.
"Maybe you'll just ask him, you know? If he's really serious this time."
"No," answered Jared firmly. "Forgetting about the small part in which he's calling me a sappy girl for wanting to talk about feelings, he was serious every time he got married. It didn't help much."
"Huh. Maybe ask him if he isn't serious then..."
He rolled his eyes at her.
"Thanks, Sandy. You're being great help really."
"You're welcome, hon!" Answered Sandy with a smile, proving that she was not only pretty and smart, but also completely immune to sarcasm.
"He'll be gone for at least an hour," said Jared quickly coming into the bedroom. "Check the pockets, while I'll search the backpack and nightstand?"
Sandy sighed, but obediently reached for some dirty jeans, thrown on the floor. She took a deep breath and with a face of someone risking his life for a better cause, she put her hand in the first pocket.
"Don't you think we're getting a bit... extreme with this? I mean one thing is to look into his coat pockets and completely other search through all his things."
"Uh-huh," mumbled Jared barely listening to her, while poking through the contains of Chad's backpack that he just tossed onto the bed. "I just need to be sure..."
"'Bout what? If I toss the wrappings after my candies?"
Jared turned quickly to obviously irritated Chad standing in the doorway and looking at them carefully.
"Busted," whispered Sandy.
"You know, last time I was in this situation my mum searched my room." Said Chad slowly sounding so steal and monotonous that Jared's theory about 'irritation' went straight to the dumpster. Chad was mad as hell. "And I may add she hadn't found anything."
"She found half-naked Ricky Martin photo," noted Jared numbly and felt slightly relieved at Chad's snort.
"Well, but compared with what she could find, she hadn't found anything."
"Well, since you obviously not planning on killing each other, I think I'll leave. Like about now," muttered Sandy and quickly made her way to the door.
After she went past Chad, she turned to face her friend and gave him a sign to call later. Jared just nodded, barely moving his eyes away from Chad.
"So... Seriously, what the hell were you looking for?"
"Proof on what may be in my backpack? Alien's life?"
"I wanted to know, if you're sleeping with someone else..." mumbled Jared, now slightly embarrassed by his suspicions.
Chad just stared at him for a moment as in slightly shocked by this news.
"You think I'm really that much of an asshole?" he asked finally and this time Jared's 'duh' obviously wasn't the right answer.
Jared was laying on his side, arms wrapped around his pillow and eyes closed tightly, when he heard the click of the front door and stopped even trying to fall asleep. He didn't move, barely breathed, when he heard Chad moving up to the bedroom and undressing in the corner. He sighed quietly, when he felt the other man sliding in bed and spooning behind him.
"I thought you won't come back," admitted Jared in a quiet whisper as if afraid he may scare Chad away, if he'll be louder or make some sudden move.
"You also thought I'm fucking around, while sleeping with ya," noted Chad and Jared could feel him shaking his head. "Oh ye of absolutely no faith whatsoever."
Jared smiled slightly, moving few inches back to snuggle closer to the other man.
"I mean, honestly," continued Chad. "I know I'm an asshole, but dude, I'm not a stupid one!"
Since the darkness and their position hide big grin on Jared's face from Chad's sight, the only answer he got was quite an obvious silence.
"Oh, shut up, bitch."
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